A Savage Debt (Beholden Duet Book 1) Page 7

  Ana shook her head as tears slid out of the corner of her eye and onto the bed. She told mother she would tell her everything that happened, but she couldn’t. There was no way she could explain this. It wouldn’t help them find anything out about Maddoc; it would only embarrass her. She hadn’t even spent time trying to learn anything about him that could aid the king and kingdom. She’d failed.

  After a few long moments, Ana slowly inched out from underneath his arm and leg, trying not to disturb him and avoid any unnecessary pain from moving too fast. When she finally climbed out of the bed, she headed straight to the table to gulp down some water. The cold liquid soothed her mind as well as cooled her body, and as she made her way back to the bed her emotions had settled and her mind felt clearer.

  She stood by the bed staring at the Alpha. Looking at him now, she could see his appeal. He held many of the desired physical traits of an Alpha and she could see the attraction women might have to him, at the most crude and basic level. But that was no excuse for her behavior. She had lost her mind to the pleasure that he had forced on her, and although it was her first time, she had not even tried to restrain herself at any point. The shame instilled in her would be a stain on her opinion of herself forever.

  She noticed the book she bought to the room on the floor by the bed and picked it up as she headed to the far-right corner of the room. Sliding down the wall, she curled herself up holding the book to her chest, forcing herself to remember who she was and why she was there. As Father had said, this Alpha couldn’t change that. No matter what he did, he would not change who she was.

  She remained curled in the corner as the light in the window brightened, and she desperately hoped that dawn would arrive before the Alpha woke.

  Unfortunately, he stirred before that. She watched him as he grabbed the bed for her, and then lifted his head to look around the room.

  When his eyes reached her, she forced herself not to look away, even though that annoying tremble in her stomach reappeared. She forced the feeling aside in annoyance.

  “Come here.”

  Ana gritted her teeth at the urge that surged through her to follow his instructions, and the swoop in her stomach at the sound of his voice. Why did Alphas have this kind of power over Omegas? It was unfair. Even her clit twinged in response. She dragged her eyes from him and focused on a spot on the floor in front of her.

  “I said come here, Analisa,” he demanded.

  “It’s nearly dawn.”

  “I have you until the sun breaks over the horizon,” the Alpha said, his agitation clear.

  “You’ve had me plenty of times,” Ana murmured, her mouth tight with annoyance.

  The Alpha grunted, the sound coarse. “Indeed. You have almost restored my faith in royalty.”

  Ana closed her eyes in disgust, trying to block out the amusement in his tone. “I’m glad to have helped,” she murmured. “But at dawn I return to being a princess instead of your whore.”

  “I think you could easily transition to either job,” the outlaw said. “You may have missed your true profession in life. You enjoy being fucked more than any whore I know.”

  “And you know many, do you?” Ana snapped before she had a chance to stop herself. “I forget that your reputation is littered with whoring and raping. Did my pussy stink strongly enough for you?”

  The Alpha rolled onto his front, stretching the length of the bed as he looked at her in the corner. His beard was once again twisted in that annoying smile, and his eyes were relaxed. “I admit I was mistaken on that front. Your scent is delicious. But your insistence to believe in folktales about me is adorable. Particularly when you have been fabricated in the same way across the kingdom.”

  Ana eyed him. “What do you mean?”

  “You are said to be the virginal, innocent princess.” He raised an eyebrow. “You are nothing like any innocent woman I know.”

  “Everyone knows that I will not remain virginal and innocent forever,” she shot at him. “In fact, my marriage takes place in less than a month’s time. It’s pretty obvious that I’m not going to remain a virgin after that night. All you have done is broken my virginity a little bit earlier, nothing more.”

  The Alpha’s face darkened. “Your betrothed will not want you after tonight.”

  “He has really told me he will,” Ana said “So whatever plans you have to ruin my life has already failed.”

  The Alpha rose from the bed swiftly, his face contorted. He was enormous as he loomed over her, and once again, the terror returned. Ana clung onto her book, forcing herself to remember that she was his prisoner, and he had already done the worst to her. Besides, dawn was approaching rapidly, there was only so much he could do.

  “You can think whatever the fuck you like,” the Alpha growled, his eyes blazing. “As long as you understand that you do not fuck anyone else until after our third night.”

  Ana shook her head, her mouth tight. “You don’t control my days, only my nights. I can do whatever I want during my days.” Father had said so.

  “Is that what you think?” the Alpha roared.

  Ana tensed at his sudden volume and pressed herself against the wall. Agony worked through her rigid body, but she couldn’t relax in front of such anger.

  The Alpha towered over her, his glorious muscles contracting as he leaned on the wall over her. “If you fuck anyone, if you even let anyone touch you, I will kill everyone who lives in the palace.”

  Ana glared up at him. “You think I believe you can do that?”

  “I don’t give a fuck what you think you know, princess. Do you think I don’t have people in the palace? Guards and members of the assembly who are on my side, or working for me and don’t even know it? Do you think if I didn’t want everyone in the palace dead they would still be walking around with their painfully pitiful lives? You live in a make-believe world, Analisa. Nothing at the palace is as it seems, and you are readily able to swallow that reality because it suits you to ignore it. I thought you were some unintelligent puppet, no thought in your head to understand the obvious realities around her. But now I see you have just been sheltered from the truth and have no interest in bridging the gaps.” He gestured to her book. “You clearly read, and yet you don’t choose to read anything of importance, only folktales to make yourself feel more like a child when you are twenty-one years old.”

  “This is not a representation of everything I read,” Ana bit out, jerking forward from the wall. “You think you know me because you have been in my presence for a few hours?” she spat.

  Maddoc’s brow raised. “I know more about you than you think. And I know more about what goes on in this stinking cesspit that is Allandis’ high society and royal court. If anyone touches you, if you fuck anyone, everyone will be killed. Do you understand? From your father to your precious lady-in-waiting Milly.”

  A vicious hatred coursed through Ana making her incapable of responding. She glared at him as her fingers dug into the book at her chest. She wasn’t exactly in the position to have sex with anyone else, she’d barely survived the night with him. But the fact that he thought he could order her around like he owned her, like she was his property, infuriated her beyond belief. He did not own her days!

  “You better fucking respond,” the Alpha boomed, his bitter aggression seeping into his scent. “Do you understand?”

  “Yes,” Ana said, forcing the word out as hard as she could.

  “Good.” The Alpha grabbed his cock and reached for her head. At some point during their exchange, he had hardened and Ana’s eyes widened as he pulled her toward him, pushing her to her knees and forcing her head back.

  She didn’t have time to process what was happening or to prepare. He simply pushed himself in her mouth, and she opened like she was supposed to.

  Ana remained stiff. Her position was awkward and uncomfortable, raised slightly from the floor by his hand yanking her up. Her thighs scream in pain but she was not going to give him the satisfaction
of hearing her complain or whine about it. At least he wasn’t pushing his cock to the back of her throat this time.

  He worked in and out of her mouth, grunting as he looked down on her, and she felt her body responding to not only the silky feel and complex taste of him on her tongue, but the older souring scent of their sex that saturated them both.

  He pumped faster when she flicked her eyes up to glance at him and soon, she was trying not to choke as he reached farther into her throat. Without warning, he pulled out and pumped himself with fist as his seed shot out of him and directly onto her. She tried to turn her head, but he held it in place as his warm fluid splattered all over her face, hair, and neck, marking her.

  When he finally let go, she slumped back to the wall, blinking back the tears in her eyes. He was reminding her of her whore status. And clearly she could only be that for him—at least until their third night.

  He pried her book away from her hands and walked away to get dressed. Suddenly, the sun streamed into the window, and she breathed a sigh, grateful that the night was finally over.

  The Alpha strode to the door holding her torn dress and her favorite book, and looked back at her. “Do not forget what I said, Analisa.” The menace in his tone forced her to nod.

  Finally, he turned and left.

  Ana couldn’t even enjoy the relief that flooded her because fear, anger, dread, and shame overwhelmed it. She lowered her head to her knees and cried.

  5

  It was Milly who came to get her.

  Ana wasn’t sure how long she was in the room for. She sobbed until a tired emptiness overwhelmed her, draining her of all feeling. Having already realized it was impossible to leave the room with no clothes, and having been marked so completely with Maddoc’s seed, sweat, and scent, she didn’t have the energy to try to figure what to do.

  When the door open and faint sniffing sounds came from the person tentatively stepping in, she hoped it was her mother.

  “Ana!” Milly rushed to her and crouching down, grabbing her hands. “Are you all right, Ana?”

  Ana lifted her head an inch to meet Millie’s eyes. “No” was all she managed to get out before she broke into fresh sobs.

  “Don’t worry, Ana. You’ve already made it through one night.” She squeezed Ana’s hand. “Once we get you back to your room among your own things, in your own clothes, cleaned up and rested, you’ll feel better and more like yourself.”

  Ana shook her head. She wasn’t sure she’d ever feel the same again. Something felt broken—as if coming into contact with Maddoc had caused irreparable damage inside her. She hated him for the things he said, the things he did, and what he made her feel—both good and bad.

  “Let me get you some clothes,” Milly said, patting her hand.

  When Milly returned, she carried a number of gowns and shawls for Ana to wear so she could return to her room, but none of them were suitable in Ana’s opinion. She knew she looked like a disaster from the top of her head to the bottom of her feet. If she were to wear anything that exposed her hair, courtiers would notice she didn’t look as pristine as she normally did, and they would talk. On the other hand, she couldn’t exactly walk around with her head and face completely covered with shawls. That would be even worse.

  “We have to do something,” Milly said firmly. “Let’s just go with a gown. Your father is clearing this wing of the palace—no one will be able to see you.”

  “The guards will see me.”

  Milly shrugged as though incredulous that she would say such a thing. “They are guards, Ana. They don’t care about what you look like, only that you need to be protected.”

  “Don’t be naïve, Milly!” Ana snapped. “Who do you think they talk to when they go home? What will they say? They heard me in here.” Oncoming sobs hindered her ability to speak any further, but Milly was uncharacteristically silent. Ana had never snapped at her like that before, no matter what she thought in her mind, she never once said anything ungracious out loud. The bastard had already changed her by making her fight him so hard. “I’m sorry, Milly,” she said. “I’m just… I don’t want anyone to see me like this. I don’t want Ryden to see me or hear about it, and I don’t want Mother or Father to see me. It’s bad enough that it happened—they don’t have to see the result. And I don’t want to talk to anyone either. As soon as I’m back to my room, I want to be left alone.”

  “That may not be possible,” Milly said. “Both your parents are asking to speak to you as a matter of urgency to find out what happened.”

  “Well, they’re not here, are they?” The words burst out of her mouth before she had a chance to think about it.

  Milly’s eyes narrowed. “I understand you’re upset, young lady, but you will need to relearn how to hold your tongue. All of your training will not be undone in one night, if I can help it. You are tired, and it’s causing you to act irrationally, but you’d better restrain yourself when you meet your parents.”

  Ana lowered her eyes. Maybe Milly was right. She sighed, allowing herself to settle back into that void of emptiness. She was too exhausted to maintain any real fight, and what was the point?

  In the end, Milly collected a hat with a wide brim for Ana to wear over her messy, seed-clumped hair, and she paired it with a conservative evening gown that showed barely any skin. The result allowed only her face to be exposed.

  After she was escorted back to her room, she sent Milly away—much to Milly’s protesting—then took a long, hot bath. She scrubbed herself vigorously and lathered and rinsed her hair more times than she could count.

  Afterward, she slid into bed, intending to sleep, but as she did a rough knock sounded against the door. She ignored it for as long as she could, but then a voice called through the door.

  “Ana, you will open this door now.” It was Father.

  Ana took a breath. She couldn’t exactly ignore him. Padding to the door, she opened it to find both her parents waiting outside.

  “I am really tired, I need to get some—”

  Her parents both swept into her room and surrounded her with a double hug. They’d never done that before. Ana rested her head on her mother’s shoulder, taking comfort from both of them reassuring her and blinking away the flowing tears. It was as though time slowed for an endless, comforting moment.

  The queen pulled away first. “I know you want to sleep, Ana,” she said, sitting down on the chair in the room. “And you will. But it is imperative that you tell us everything that happened first.”

  “Where is he?” Ana asked, suddenly realizing that she didn’t know where Maddoc has gone once he’d left the room.

  “Don’t worry, Ana,” the queen said quickly. “He’s left the palace.”

  Ana stared at them in disbelief. “So he is permitted to leave and reenter whenever he pleases?”

  The king ground his jaw, his anger clear, but then queen gestured for Ana to sit down. “We will explain everything, Ana. Let’s talk first.”

  The king stood next to the queen while Ana sat on her bed. She tried not to move as though she was in pain but she was sure her father could tell.

  “Nothing good happened,” she muttered. “I didn’t find out anything new, and I didn’t… escape him.”

  She didn’t miss the look her parents exchanged.

  “Did he say anything about the situation?” the queen asked. “Anything at all?”

  Ana thought back to her exchanges with him. “He said I should know why he is doing this. He told me I should know more than I do about the kingdom and that I am a fool.”

  The queen stiffened. “Anything else? Anything about the promise or about any plans he has for the kingdom? Anything about his men or where they are based?”

  Ana shook her head again, annoyed this time. “We didn’t exactly chat much, Mother. Why would he tell me that?”

  “You are an Omega,” the queen said pointedly. “He is an Alpha.”

  Ana stared at her confused. How did that explain anythin
g? “There was nothing like that. He mocked me and then…” She shifted uncomfortably on the bed, averting her eyes. “… used me. Repeatedly.” The mortification of having to say this to her parents nearly made her break down in sobs again, but she pushed it back sharply as something occurred to her. “There was a crowd on the edge of the royal grounds. I think he arranged it.”

  Her father’s fists clenched and he exhaled. “Yes, we know. It wasn’t discovered until it was already dark.”

  “How did it happen? I thought the grounds would be secure, especially there.”

  “There was a significant disturbance at another part of the grounds that drew the attention of many of the guards. There weren’t enough remaining to disperse the crowd. We suspected he would do something, even organize two disruptions at the same time, but not that we would need such significant resources at both.”

  “We’re sorry about that, Ana,” the queen said, gently. “It won’t happen again.”

  Ana nodded, but the outlaw’s words floated back to her. Do you think I don’t have people in the palace? She doubted it was true, but if he did, none of them were safe anyway.

  “This is one of the reasons he can come and go as he pleases,” the king added, his face dark. “The commoners are aware he has earned the Royal Promise and they enjoy seeing him enter and exit the castle.”

  “It’s like a morbid fascination for them,” the queen added, somewhat disgusted. “Seeing the kingdom’s worst outlaw have access to the palace like that.”